Worst Night of My Life

Who died? First my father, then my uncle, then my country.

I spent the last 40 hours pacing the figurative hospital ward watching Al Jazeera and BBC (can't stomach Wolf Blitzer), shocked and outraged, hurt and sad. My homeland is dead.

There goes democracy. There goes the rule of law. There go checks and balances. There goes the Truth. There goes quality public education. There goes a livable minimum wage. Union organizing power. Racial equality. Gender equality. Religious equality. And there goes my health insurance. I can't afford premiums that exceed my salary. And there goes the Ukraine. There go our Nato alliances. There goes the A-bomb. (oops)

A strong, decent, qualified woman was defeated by the KKK-KGB-FBI-Wikileaks coalition. Love trumps hate? You wish, Hill, you wish. Hate won, fear won, unapologetic racism won, nasty middle finger nationalism. They're buying lynching ropes and firebombs for Southern churches right now. They're wearing their side-arms to the minimart to buy beer while they keep their military weapons in the back of the pickup. They're planning the mass deportations and round-ups of illegals (i.e., human beings filled with hope we gave them). The wall already exists in the Trumpists' minds against everyone the least bit different from Ozzie and Harriet, even among people who've never heard of Ozzie and Harriet. And the archetypal choice was dramatic: Public servant vs. Ruthless capitalist. Is that the sound of goose-steps? Trump voters, you can't say later, "We didn't know."

Trump's already forming his Anti-Washington, Anti-Establishment team composed of old hack politicians and insiders. What? Yeah, and I thought people voted according to the question: Are you better off now than eight years ago? Or can't y'all remember back then, the Second Great Depression, stock market crash, housing foreclosures, lay-offs, you really think America's worse now? Show me the figures. 'Hey, we don't need no stinkin' figures.'

Berlusconi ruined the lives of normal Italians for twenty years. I know, I am one. Rape culture towards women, rape culture towards the Earth, rape culture towards economic parity, rape culture towards culture, rape culture towards critical thinking. (I use the R-word both literally and figuratively. As you know, one third of all women are raped and/or beaten in their lifetimes.) Now the crass American version of Macho-Man can look down on the world from his ugly tower and think, "Wow, I can do whatever the fuck I want." This two-bit scammer, psycho, pervert, violent bully is now the most dangerous man on the planet. The King. With his hair on fire.

Italians ask me how Hillary won the popular vote and lost. Incomprehensible, dysfunctional system. Polls not worth shit. Commentators full of gas. Demographics, my ass. 'Latino surge' 'Women against sexual predators', 'Millennials', etc., where, what? All I see is red. And "working class" is now a synonym for brainwashed, for National Enquirer believers, slogan reciters, Sieg Heilers. So the big question: Why did Hillary lose? Answer: Because she's a woman. Period.

Oh man, they're toasting in Moscow tonight! They finally got their bitches into power. Trump's cabinet looks like: Mike Tyson, minister of sexual assault; Ted Nugent, minister of filth, David Duke, minister of Nazi Resurgence, Pete Rose, minister of cheating, Sarah Palin, minister of nonsense, Tia Tequila, minister of sicko porn, and Dennis Rodman, minister of mental illness. DT: "And BTW, kids, while I'm gone, save my crumbling empire from implosion. Let's make some money out of this. And if this deal doesn't work out, I'll just go back on TV. After bankruptcy."

Dude, what have you been smoking? Climate change is a Chinese hoax? More fossil fuel consumption is the answer to the environmental crisis? Close the EPA, abandon the Paris Accords? Animals exist to be shot? Asbestos got a bad rap? Coal is clean? Are we in some True-is-false/false-is-true Nightmare Sci-Fi Alternate Reality TV World? Well, at least his wife, the new First Lady, is not an android.

Speaking of women, listen, let me ask you Trumpmen something; it's okay, isn't it, if another guy grabs your wife/daughter/girlfriend/mother by the pussy, right? Doesn't bother you, does it? You'd do the same. That's what you voted for. Pussy-grabbing legitimization. Women are all Barbie dolls anyway, worthy of a photo shoot, clothed or naked, but not truly equals. On their knees, God made women to service men, right? Disgusted yet? It's okay, you don't believe in evolution anyway. Women's rights, civil rights, the rights of the disabled, religious freedom, free speech, women's body freedom, LGBT rights, minority rights and protections: fuck all that, everybody get back to the stone age! And they're already shooting in LA and Seattle.

Do-overs? Let the Trumpster-Trickster crash and burn first? Like a vaccine, you drink poison to keep healthy? Maybe. Will another Movement spring up to bring down the Man? Calling young militants. Come in. Come in.

I didn't actually vote, you know. That is, as a teaching trick I asked my students to advise me, especially on the state propositions. We filled out my absentee ballot in class. Good thing I agreed with their choices. But this was an historic moment for me. I finally came out. No more pseudo-neutrality. I am a proud progressive, son of proud progressives. I previously hesitated to publically express my liberal-radical opinions, because I didn't want my students to be shy about expressing theirs, whatever they are. And I didn't identify as Democrat. But now? Fair and balanced? Fuck that, I need to be myself. I'm old enough, I've earned it. Plus, there's no going back. Now it's Obama, Hillary, Sanders, Warren, you and me against the Dark Side of the Force. That scary clown is not my president.

So I say to myself:

Stay Strong.

Stay Focused.

Don't Give Up the Fight.

Martin