Desperate Need of Nothing

Mutt: So what’s up with the Boss?

Jeff: Silence is golden.
Mutt: Maybe he doesn’t have anything to say. Ran out of brains.
Jeff: Never stopped him before.
Mutt: I heard he wrote some posts on the current political situation, but is too chicken to publish them.
Jeff: Squawk, squawk.
Mutt: Quack, quack.
Jeff: Did you hear about the two microbes who lived inside of a horse?
Mutt: What? Another microbe joke!
Jeff: They were just barely squeaking out a living by eating any small particles of food that passed by the tiny capillary in which they were living. After discussing it among themselves, they decided to move out to a bigger artery, and then to a large vein, but too late they realized their mistake. They forgot the old maxim: Don’t change streams in mid-horse.
Mutt: Once there was a King who was loved by all of his subjects, especially because of the hunting excursions he shared with them. As will happen, one day he died and his eldest son took the throne. Now this new king was an animal-lover to the core, and immediately outlawed all forms of hunting and fishing. His subjects accepted this for only a short time before they ousted him.
Jeff: So what?
Mutt: So what? Well, this is a truly significant event, because it's the first time a reign was called on account of the game.
Jeff: Every one a winner.
Mutt: Yabba dabba doo.
Jeff: It seems that there were these three pregnant Indian squaws, all due to give birth at about the same time. The first squaw gave birth to a boy, and the birthing was done on a deer hide. The second also gave birth to a boy, but this was done on a bear hide. And the third had twins, two boys, and she did this on a hippopotamus hide.
Mutt: I am really afraid to ask.
Jeff: This shows us that the sons of the squaw on the hippopotamus hide is equal to the sum of the squaws on the other two hides.
Mutt: I don’t get it.
Jeff: Neither do I.
Mutt: For the love of Mike!
Jeff: Oowah!